Divorces can be super stressful, hostile, heartbreaking and traumatizing even. You’d be wise if you look for ways to make the process easier and smoother, instead of giving in to temper. You’d also be lucky if your partner is willing to keep things civil.

Consider therapy and getting support.

 Going through a divorce is usually a very emotionally scarring process; it tends to leave an empty space or make you feel alone. Try to talk about your feelings and problems, discuss it with a therapist so that you are able to deal with emotions in a more mature and healthy way.

Getting the feelings and loose ends out of your system and well dealt-with is a healthy start towards a healthy separation. Get support and emotional assistance from whomever you prefer- friends, co-workers, family members. Separations are difficult and a strain on the heart, don’t be in denial and don’t be afraid of showing and sharing it!   

Keeping a positive attitude

Maintain an attitude of mutual respect with your partner so that things don’t get heated. Hostile breakups are harder on both partners in every aspect. Try to constantly be the bigger person and let go of petty issues. The whole purpose of a peaceful separation is to make it easier for both parties and definitely children if children are involved.

Don’t try to prove whose fault the breakup is, no matter how much you’re tempted to. The blame game is well known for waging wars. Whenever a person is blamed, naturally they WILL try to defend themselves, either calmly or harshly because barely anybody takes blames lightly!

It doesn’t matter if the blame is valid or not, it’s an excellent way to start a never-ending quarrel. These little barriers to a peaceful break up are exactly what you should avoid, to move on with the divorce process amicably.

Don’t involve lawyers!

Try to keep lawyers and the court as far away as possible, because that is a fast way to make things difficult. There are many ways of getting a divorce in Oklahoma nowadays, and dragging the matter to court is not always necessary. Only go that far, if you know for sure there is no other way since every divorce is different!

But make sure you’re not giving in to your temper or stubbornness because that will affect the big picture badly. You want your partner and kids to be as less affected by the divorce as it can possibly get!

Keeping a healthy and positive attitude should be like a mantra that you keep repeating to yourself as a friendly reminder! Times may feel difficult, but it is much healthier this way than bringing in divorce lawyers who will only heat up the situation (and exhaust your bank account)!

Educate yourself

 Try to dig up as much information as you can about divorces and your rights because only then you will be able to make an informed choice and come to a well-evaluated decision. Being informed will allow you to understand your own financial situation and options, and therefore help you manage the divorce system more smoothly.  

Decide to be reasonable, regardless of what your spouse does

 It isn’t possible to control how your spouse will act, especially amidst a divorce, but you know what you can control? How you act and react to everything. Just because your spouse is going crazy, doesn’t mean you should lose your calm. One person needs to contain the insanity to some extent!